Recently, I have found myself saying “no” to people more and more often. A lot of it has to do with the money being offered, but there are many times when I give away services or my time for free. Really, the truth of the matter is that I turn away work when it doesn’t resonate with the mission, or purpose, of my business.

Do you have a mission for your business? Mine is “To engage business leaders in the marketing-communications process, creating results through relationship development and consistent messaging.” Obviously, nowhere in there does it say I turn away opportunities, but if they don’t fit with what I’m doing and where I’m going, they aren’t good for me. Let me share with you some examples.

A while back, a client came to me through referral who needed some long-copy work for her website and email communications to support a teleseminar she was conducting. I don’t write long copy; I am a marketing writer and focus on short, concise, and direct messaging. I also didn’t like her product and felt that her approach was lacking integrity. At the time, I really needed the $1,000+ I knew this project would add to my wallet—but I turned it away. I chose to refer the project to a long-copy colleague who provided excellent service and made the client very happy.

Recently, a colleague came to me and asked me to do some writing for her clients as a vendor and wanted me to offer my services at a discount. Previously (when I was more desperate than I am now), I buckled and gave her a large discount off my listed prices. I subcontract often, and no one else ever gets a discount, so when she approached me this time, I was hesitant. First, my client base has improved since our first interaction. Also, she was slow to pay and to follow up with me, so I didn’t much like her business ethics. I thought about it and chose to offer her less of a discount this time around. When she came back to me about it, I was honest. I also suggested she might want to work with another writer.

In both of these cases, taking on that work wouldn’t have made me happy. I work for myself, so being happy in my job is pretty important! Happiness aside, however, taking on projects that I don’t like or that don’t resonate with my mission means that I will provide below-par quality, which will sully my reputation as a writer and business professional.

I encourage you to take some time to reevaluate your mission (whether it’s for your business or your personal mission as an employee) and be sure that the projects you accept fit with the direction in which you’re headed. If you follow that guiding light, you will find that you’ll attract better work that makes you happy and provides your clients with a reason to smile.

I had just been at the bank a few days earlier to close my personal accounts, yet the same woman with whom I spoke then wasn’t even there on my return visit. In fact, I didn’t recognize anyone—and certainly no one recognized me. I had to wait at least 10 minutes to be seen, and when I was greeted, the banker didn’t even shake my hand nor did she make eye contact. When I told her I wanted to close my accounts, she asked me the obligatory “Why?” I told her it was because of fees (the truth), including the $35 overdraft I’d just been charged. She proceeded to close the account, asking me for the outstanding amount, roughly $45.

Here’s where this big bank lost an opportunity—and the lesson for you in your business. When I told her the only reason I was leaving the bank was because of fees, a customer service-oriented individual would have said something like, “I’m so sorry to hear that, and we’re sorry to lose your business. I see that you received an overdraft fee when closing this account, so let me waive that for you.”

I told a colleague about this, and he said, “But they know they’ve already lost your business. What’s the incentive for them to not charge you the $35?” Ah, but here’s the thing: even though I’m leaving, would you rather leave your exiting customers with a positive or negative impression of your business? As it stands, not only would I not return to said bank, I would vehemently discourage my friends and colleagues from doing business with them. Granted, there’s one on every corner and ATMs in every mall (my initial reason for choosing them), but is that level of “convenience” worth the hassle of not being valued or appreciated?

Every company is going to lose customers. It’s inevitable. Your ability to handle that separation gracefully will define you, not only as an individual but also as a great business owner who always maintains a focus on customer service—whether someone remains your customer or not.

When I first started my business – I’m sure like many other new business owners – I guarded my money closely and was hesitant to offer a money-back guarantee on my services. Then, a few years ago, while attending a networking event, the topic came up in discussion. As the facilitator of the event pointed out, if you believe that your product or service is of the highest quality, why wouldn’t you offer a guarantee? That made sense to me, so I immediately changed my attitude and policy. So it went for a couple of years – until recently. In the five months of 2010, I have been asked for a refund twice.

The most important thing to remember about refunds is to remain professional and honor your word. Recently, a client emailed me to let me know she didn’t feel like a priority in the process and wanted a refund. She was extremely polite about it, and I matched her tone. In my response, I told her I would be happy to terminate our professional relationship and outlined what parts of the package she had received and for what she had paid. She had originally requested half her money be returned, and after calculating time and giving her a couple of freebies, I provided a number that was a little less than half. I told her that, if she agreed to that amount, I would put a check in the mail to her that day.

The client’s response was what surprised me. Not only did she agree to the amount, she said she’d refer me in the future! I was dumbfounded. She had originally stated she didn’t feel like a priority, and here she was saying she would send referrals (note: she mentioned nothing about poor quality). I spoke to a couple of business colleagues about the situation, who were able to explain where I disconnected in the conversation.

I had honored my word and handled the situation with professionalism and dignity. I thanked the client for her feedback, acknowledged where I had fallen short (by delivering her document later than originally promised), and provided a reasonable refund amount. By not arguing with the client or discounting her, I maintained my integrity in her eyes – hence why she said she would refer me.

Refunds are going to happen, especially in a time when clients are struggling financially and having to make tough choices about where to spend their money. When you’re asked for money back, be sure you have a clear policy, learn from the experience to improve your business, and remain professional in your interactions. You never know what good might come from the experience.

So I was.

I told him I am looking for someone fit since I’m at the gym pretty regularly and want someone who enjoys similar things (and can keep up). His knee-jerk reaction was to ask why women always judge on looks first. “Whatever happened to starting as friends?” Aha – but that wasn’t his question, was it? He wanted to know if I found him attractive, not if I thought we could be friends.

In your business, are you asking the right questions? Are you ready to accept the answers? Too many business owners are living in a bubble, assuming that the way in which they perceive things to be is the way they are – without asking for feedback.

When I met with a new strategic partner recently, he said he’d heard a lot about me in town. This person owns the #1 executive placement firm according to Ranking Arizona, and he’d heard of me. (Phoenix is a very small big city.) I was, of course, impressed, but the next thing I asked was, “Was it good?” If he’s heard bad things, I need to know because that feedback will help me to improve and take action. Thankfully, he’d heard great things about me (which is why he was sitting in my office), so my reputation is strong – for now.

I encourage you to start asking people in your circle – clients, prospects, and colleagues – what their perception is of your business. You may be surprised at the answers, and they can give you an opportunity to grow.

Whether you’re a business owner, job seeker, or just average Joe Citizen, you want to manage your brand and your reputation. You can run an alert on just about anything: your name, your company name, your competitors’ names, a keyword for your industry; the sky’s the limit. You can have the alerts come “as they happen” or digested, depending on your need to know. Since WordPress and Google have a symbiotic relationship, when I post a blog, I receive a notification within 10 minutes, so it can happen pretty quickly.

If you know what people are saying about you, you can comment back and, if it’s negative, you can do immediate crisis management. I’m always amazed where I come up in searches. Sometimes people quote my blog and never ask, so I didn’t realize. Of course, I’m not the only Amanda Collins in the world, so I see what my namesakes are doing as well.

It’s pretty simple to set up, really. Go to Google Alerts and put in your parameters. Remember that if you want to track an exact phrase, you have to put it in quotation marks (“”). If you want to track a keyword, you can use the results as fodder in your social media communications or cut parts into your blog.

Keep in mind that the name of the game is communications and relationships, so while you’re definitely out there managing your brand, share some of the information you find with your network and you’ll win in two ways.

If you’re as old as I am, you likely remember the Clairol commercial about one woman telling two friends, she tells two friends, and so on, and so on. Although great news can spread fast, negative news will spread like wildfire. At a BNI meeting this week, the educational coordinators were relaying a story about how a man refunded a client’s full price paid on an automotive repair because he’d rather lose a few hundreds of dollars immediately than the potential thousands he could lose on the bad publicity for years to come.

You don’t need to be McDonald’s or Pepsi to be a “brand.” Susan Smith or ABC Marketing are just as powerful brands to the people you’re trying to cultivate and influence. So how are you managing your brand? Are you seeing what people are saying about you on Google, Facebook, LinkedIn, and Twitter? Are you conscientious about the things you share in person and through social media? In the digital age, everything about you can be shared – quickly. Everyone is a member of the paparazzi, it seems, and YouTube submission is just a click away.

I encourage you to consider what your brand is, no matter if you’re looking to land a client, a job, or a date, and start to create a strategy around managing it. Unless you hire a PR firm, no one else is going to do it for you.